How will you feel if you tell someone a personal tale and discover that they aren’t truly listening? You’d probably be disappointed.
Unfortunately, this is true for a large number of people. The majority of people are not excellent listeners. They pretend that they are listening. On the other hand, true listening involves more effort than most people are ready to put in. A good discussion requires both give and take. Most individuals prefer putting their points across rather than listening to opposing viewpoints.
Paying attention to what someone is saying shows that you care and respect them. People frequently feel like they are not being heard when they are not actively listening. That is why everyone must learn how to be a better listener.
How to Improve Your Listening Skills
For the sake of argument, let’s pretend you need some work on your listening skills and, after reading this article, you decide to improve. So, what are some of the steps you need to do to make it happen? How can you improve your listening skills?
Pay Close Attention
Good listeners are always alert. They aren’t looking impatiently at their watch or phone or thinking about other things to do. They’re concentrating and listening to what the person in front of them is saying. This is referred to as active listening.
Active listening entails using all your senses to listen. The ‘active listener’ should be perceived to be attending and paying full attention to the speaker. If this is not happening, the speaker may think what they are saying is boring.
As previously said, it is common for the mind to drift away. We are, after all, human. However, a good listener will deflect all distractions that make them lose focus.
I want to point out that you may also “listen” to body cues. If someone continues glancing at their phone, you can conclude that their attention isn’t on the topic. The secret is to pay attention.
Use Upbeat Body Language
Body language may reveal a lot about a person. Are they enthralled, bored, or worried?
The body language of a good listener is open. They lean forward, interested in what is being said. Their facial expressions are either cheerful, concerned, or displaying empathy. They’re signaling to the speaker that they’ve been heard.
People say things for a reason: they want feedback. For example, you may speak to your partner, “I had a really bad day!” And your spouse keeps scrolling through his newsfeed while nodding his head. That’s not a good reaction.
But what if your spouse looks up with puzzled eyes, puts his phone down, and says, “Oh, no. “What transpired?” So, how would you feel? The solution is self-evident.
Interrupting the Speaker Is Not a Good Idea
I’m sure you wouldn’t want to be in the middle of a sentence when you notice the other person putting up a finger or opening their mouth, ready to jump into your unfinished statement. It’s impolite and generates tension. You’d probably feel compelled to hurry what you’re saying simply to finish your account.
Interrupting is considered disrespectful. It effectively says, “What I have to say is far more significant than what you have to say.” Interrupting the speaker makes them feel agitated, harried, and irrelevant.
When you interrupt a speaker to agree, disagree, debate, etc., the speaker loses track of what they say. It’s incredibly aggravating. Whatever you have to say maybe postponed until the other person is finished.
Be kind and patiently wait your turn!
One of the finest ways to demonstrate your interest is to ask questions. Don’t say “that’s good” when someone tells you about their ski vacation to Mammoth. That would be a sign of disinterest and disdain. You may instead inquire, “How long have you been skiing?” “Did you find learning difficult?” “What was your favorite aspect of the trip?” and so on. By asking a few questions, the individual will think highly of you and consider you a wonderful conversationalist.
This may appear to be paradoxical. When talking with someone, you’re normally going back and forth. On occasion, all you have to do is listen, smile, or nod your head, and your speaker will feel as if they are truly heard and understood.
Listening intently will strengthen your bond with anybody in your life. Listening skills are more important than ever now when individuals are alienated from cellphones and social media.
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